I hate talking about stuff like this in male’s eye view because believe it or not, men are more emotional than women. And when it comes to discussions [like this next one], it only adds to men’s already mistrust and defenses they have up for women in general. As well, it makes them VERY self-conscious. It’s just one of those discussions that girls have among one another that men should never know about because they:
Just.
Can’t.
Handle it—or accept the sincerity it in, as I’ll explain (nor say can he see by the dawn’s early light. They just can’t) These discussions do weird things to men-even the ones who it doesn’t apply to.
SIDENOTE MENTION: (And something I mention in my unpublished book Feel Like A Lady Deal Like a Man: Tips & Secrets on Everything from: Self-Esteem, Friends, Love, Sex, and Men in Gem #3 . I may put it up, but I’ll paraphrase for now). It’s a chapter where I talk about how men relate versus how women relate, as genders).
(I went to my old server to pull up the excerpt. Here it is).
Men see themselves in other men’s experiences. Unlike women, when a man hears or comes across something that effects another man’s malehood, even if it does not apply to him, he takes that personal and ponders it carries it with him. That’s a weird thing about men that women DON’T share (sincerely). Women listen (to subjects like we are about to talking about) and listen to mark off where it doesn’t apply to them, cross their legs, sit straight with an arch in their back, chin and neck up and they are cool. *wipes forehead*
Whereas, all men listen to subjects (like this one we are about to talk about), and they all take it in. Even if a man clearly knows it doesn’t apply to him, inside, he shares the feeling and experience for the men who it does apply to. And they collect that pain or slight and take it on as their own. Men (who don’t even know each other), bond like that (in ways that women do NOT), and in that particular chapter of my unpublished book, I talk about certain things women should discuss around men (and why) and too, why women should NEVER, under no uncertain terms discuss other women negatively around men (or condone and not correct men who are discussing women negatively around them). Because if a man hears two women discussing another man (who he doesn’t even know), in an unflattering light, he takes that personal-like, as a part of his manhood too. Whereas, one woman will sit and watch two men crap on a woman and as long as it doesn’t apply to HER, she’ll even join in and if not, won’t stop them in their tracks.
In general, men get their cues on how to treat women by observing other women
In my book I explain, that is one of the reasons, a lot of men do women like they do: A lot of times it’s women’s fault, we are the ones responsible for how they treat women because they watch us and our patterns more than we give them credit for. And when (on the daily) they are around a gender that (outside of sharing heartbreak and “he’s a dog” stories other superficial things) they are being TAUGHT to be comfortable with feeling unemotional of disconnected from us as women (because they see that-unlike the man to man bond) unlike them, women don’t have that woman to woman bond in that same way (outside of sharing heartbreak, ‘he’s a dog’ stories). THAT’S what makes it easy (and almost natural/second nature) for a man to sleep with his girlfriend’s next door neighbor or sister or her friend. Men don’t see women as pillars of bonds like they bond with each other. Men only see (and on the daily get PROOF) of women’s woman to woman enmity.
All that said, subjects like this upcoming one is something ALL men are going to take personal and ‘feel’—because they share an unspoken bond with other men [that’s actually almost enviable].
So, with all that, now you understand why I said (at the start of this write up): “I hate talking about stuff like this in male’s eye view.”
At any rate.
Here goes ‘that’ subject-a subject so hush-hush that it almost seems taboo, but