{PODCAST} The Difference Between Abuse of Power vs. Bad or Unwanted Sex

Does Bad Sex or “Should’ve Said No” Mean “No?” (Yes, If Only He Can Read Your Mind Ahead of Time)

A song once sang it best:

You can’t start a fire.

Can’t start a fire without a spark.

This gun’s for hire.

Even if we’re just dancing in the dark.

…and just like that, silence was broken. And the women of Hollywood banded together to shoot their shot.

Nothing can be further from the truth and better metaphor for life for many women right now.

As long as you keep that spark and glimmer of hope while dancing in the dark, your story on the torch of your torture will in deed start a fire.

Despite the red carpets and bright lights of Tinseltown hiding the pain, such was life for the women of Hollywood who, until Rose McGowan, danced in the dark.

Without having to rehash the sordid details about the position of power “Harvey Hollywood” played in preying on countless Hollywood starlets; the fact of the matter is: Harvey Weinstein, by no means, was a victim.

He clearly and evidently abused his position of power.

 

Conversely however, comedian Aziz Ansari is another case of the same difference a different, different.

Whether self-imposed, self-fulfilling prophecy, we often talk about our purpose and destiny’s in life as being something divine and ordered; service at best but often times self-serving.

Perhaps our purpose in life may not always something self-gratifying but rather, our fate being made the scapegoat ordered by divine intervention-to provoke thought, consideration and create understanding.

Such is life and the curious case of Aziz Ansari right now who got called to the carpet just after a Golden Globe win.

With the #MeToo  movement owning the past few months and the night, ennobling and empowering the masses, now became just as good a time as any to speak out—or forever go back to holding your peace because unlike many ghosts of Christmas’s past lists in mass; no matter-male, female, space, or time, “#MeToo” now, going forward became the safety net.

But aside from all the creeps having taken advantage of their victims by abusing their power, Aziz Ansari’s accuser’s #MeToo moment left much to be desired discussed as, that grey area among the movement had finally reared its ugly unsettling head and begged the question this be questioned: Does a night of getting yourself caught in a (sexual) situation you really didn’t want to happen [or that while in] you decide discover it shouldn’t have happened anyway (because it originally was against your better judgment), make that situation sexual assault?

WITHOUT GETTING INTO THE DETAILS of what happened between the woman and Aziz (during, what he thought all this time until after the Globes, was a mere sexual their encounter), the short answer is “no.”

You see, I’ll never forget (on a popular talk show years ago), a female crime expert mentioned the importance between something called “Location 1” and “Location 2.” The point she was making was how the fight to survive should be at “Location 1” because the chances of survival if you’re moved to “Location 2” was slim to none.

I believe that because that same example can very well be applied to dating and (the victim of) cat-calling world-randomness, versus the move into your personal space and intimate settings.

So without talking about the Ansari details, the point of the podcast/audio is about how to avoid even being put in the position to be faced “location 2” with first, getting all your answers at “Location 1” which all can be gathered without entry into your personal space.

Believe it or not, there are ways, reasons, methods and steps a woman can take to get her answers before moving to “Location number 2.” And this 3-step process that I talk about is one that that we women rarely, if ever, entertain the thought of (but should consider).