Man Dies in Fortune Cookie Mix Machine Accident

On Friday’s take-out of your lil’ water chestnuts, snow-peas and “shrimp fry ri” …make sure you pray and ask for mercy over that meal, especially when you crack open that Fortune Cookie to get that leg-up on your for now and your future—lettuce pray it doesn’t contain a femur.

A 26 year-old Wonton Food Company factory worker in Austin, Texas by the name of Elmer Oscar Barrera was found dead in a machine there.

It was determined he died of multiple blunt-force trauma after falling into the cookie-dough mixing machine over the weekend.

According to the medical examiner’s office, the Harris County Institute of Forensic Science ruled the death an accident.

Wonton Foods is one of the largest fortune cookie makers in the United States.

I guess this one’ll rid us all of the cat meat for chicken superstition now, eh?