With HILARY CLINTON Official and JEB BUSH Having Announced His Plans, DONALD TRUMP Announces His Presidential 2016 Run….Too

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Pounds lighter and physically all prepped, strategized, realized and ready to do this thing holding his last name and connections to politics and privilege tightly closed in his hands and behind his back, Rep. Jeb Bush (brother of former President George W. Bush and second son of former President George Bush Sr.) is finally coming from beating around the bush for quite some time now.

Officially announced on Monday, the former Florida governor is stepping up to stand toe-to-toe against Dem. Hilary Clinton for the Presidential run come 2016 and is hitting the ground running Jeb started the campaign trail by first, heading to New Hampshire to begin making nice with the place he will definitely need at the end of all this:

Joining the race as some sort of Republican Rand Paul wildcard (in addition to about 10 other republicans in the race lining up to try and throw Hil off her game), is billionaire Donald Trump who today, announced his bid 2016’s presidential run.

With his interesting choice of words (seeing as though his prowess is engraved in business and other billionaire duties), it’s no wonder the 2016 President elect wanna-be would use a choice of words like “brand” for……(the country—United States).

LoL:

We need somebody who can take the brand of the United States and make it great again,” he said. “Ladies and gentlemen: I am officially running for president of the United States, and we are going to make our country great again.

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Feeling revitalized and ready just two days after his birthday, today in Manhattan (introduced by his daughter Invanka), in true bully billionaire (slash) beauty contestant style; the Trump dynasty and Miss America Pageant head, delivered his grand announcement from the lobby of a skyscraper bearing his name as his daughter gave us an introduction to who her dad is being introducing him like theme music to the words [from her mouth]: “My father is the opposite of politically correct. He says what he means and he means what he says.”

As if this were some kind of theme music from an intense scene of his show The Apprentice, The Donald made his royal entrance by stepping onto an escalator landing above the stage where he waved to the crowd and rode the car down to begin his speech…

Obviously when running for president the American people would hope you’d have an agenda bigger than your personal gripes about what you’re tired of arm-chair quarter-backing about but hey. I’m the kind of girl that whenever I find myself complaining about something (or what someone else should be doing), I shut up and do it by gauddayum self, so…begat this very blog and pretty much any other business venture or invention I’m working on.

In personal a griped-filled speech mostly centered around his problem with the business of America being bilked by other countries and enemies alike, the billionaire businessman (slash) wanna-be president had these things to say (we’ll just quote him).

Having flirted with the idea of running before, Trump stated:

It’s so nice to say, ‘I’m running,’ as opposed to, ‘If I run, if I run. I’m running.”

What the Donald has to say about Jeb (his favorite of all running with or opposing him):

He’s weak on immigration, he’s in favor of Common Core [state education standards]. How the hell can you vote for this guy?” (take note of his quote) LoL:

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Let the record state that despite her having turned down the invitation in 1999, Trump doesn’t however, feel he and Oprah would be quite a team as running mates:

I think Oprah would be great. I’d love to have Oprah. I think we’d win easily,” Trump said to ABC’s George Stephanopoulos.

Having been criticized before for reneging on the president run for fear of having his personal finances put on display which, to some, felt he may have embellished on over the years. The Donald had this to say (declaring his own net worth is $8,737,540,000—more than double what Forbes mag recently estimated):

“I’m really rich. I’m not doing that to brag, I’m doing that to say that that’s the kind of thinking our country needs. We need that thinking. We have the opposite thinking. We have losers.”

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Insisting this brand (country) of ours is in really deep trouble, Trump feels politicians in both parties aren’t equipped to handle the job as president—like he can:

11348312_874047692660987_37687457_nI’ve watched the politicians. I’ve dealt with them all my life. If you can’t make a good deal with a politician, then there’s something wrong with you, you’re certainly not very good. They will never make America great again. They don’t even have a chance. They’re controlled fully by the lobbyists, by the donors, and by the special interests.”

What America needs is more action, less talk.”

Our country needs a truly great leader, and we need a truly great leader now. We need a leader that wrote ‘The Art of the Deal.’ We need a leader that can bring back our jobs, can bring back our manufacturing, can bring back our military.”

We don’t have victories anymore. We used to have victories. But we don’t have them. When was the last time anybody saw us beating, let’s say, china, in a trade deal. They kill us. I beat China all the time.”

The U.S. has become a dumping ground for everybody else’s problems,” he continued. “And these aren’t the best and the finest. When Mexico sends its people, they’re not sending their best…they’re sending people that have lots of problems…they’re bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.”

Saudi Arabia, they make a billion dollars a day,” he later added. “I love the Saudis. Many are in this building. Whenever they have problems, we send over the ships…what are we doing? They got nothing but money. If the right person asks them, they’d pay a fortune. They wouldn’t be there, except for us.”

I hear my fellow Republicans, they’re wonderful people,” he said. “I hear their speeches. And they don’t talk jobs. They don’t talk China.”

Aware of his popularity and people thinking he’s not a nice person, Trump suggests:

Actually, I am. This is going to be an election that’s based on competence. Because people are tired of these nice people and they’re tired of being ripped off by everybody in the world,” he explained. “Sadly, the American dream is dead. But If I get elected President, I will bring it back bigger, better, and stronger than ever before, and we will make America great again. Thank you.”

Smh. LoL. Don’t believe me? Just watch: