“Don’t be humble, you’re not that great.” -Golda Meir
(The graphic opposite the quote pretty much sums it all up).
Humility is that thing that often times people get confused with vulnerability like people get confused with pity-(the solicitation of it) in and effort to disarm the a person (or the masses) in order to secure a position or success in or at something.
But with worldly” assignments, labels, titles and such assigned us (without words even being heard or directly spoken); it’s important to be aware that we are living a life that’s playing on words that tell us who we are (and aren’t) and who we should be (or are), leaving many to feelings of inadequacy, and others-superiority.
Given the fact that the ways we “socialize” and “network” today being a synthetic form of networking and socializing [in that] to ACTUALLY network and socialize has ZERO to do with purposely (consciously) neglecting to reply to a question/inquiry (for fear that it helps/promotes someone else) or purposely holding back asking a question/inquiring (for fear that it will take something from you) is not actual “socializing” or “networking” via a “social network.” Such things merely are [what it is]- Social ‘Media’: a place where socialization is in the form of seeing oneself as a “brand” or being in a position to possibly make something of himself as coming from obscurity to significance.
When you are apart of these “social” systems-systems that use adjectives like: “friend,” “unfriend,” “like,” “dislike.” “block,” and “follower” …then pretty much everybody is becomes on a quest to lead and see themselves as leaders. And when that happens, out the window goes any form of true “networking” and “socializing;” everything said and done becomes merely a display to sell oneself-period.
With that in mind, regular people (“regular” meaning people with regular 9 to 5 jobs who-before “social media” were not, and still ARE NOT public figures, like that of celebrity), but upon log on; conduct themselves such that they put out, respond/reply to, patronize, and flock to what they (as “regular people”) live vicariously through or what they feel can, or will reflect back to them, and their personal agenda by which they-themselves (feel) they are a “brand” of sorts.
When you have the greatest majority of that mindset, everybody resorts to trying to be a “leader” [in order to be] “liked,” [so that they can garner attention for their personal agenda that they hope can eventually benefit them in/for business].
Part of doing that is the common “trap” (in front of the eyes of people who are aware), but actually works and “tricks” (the people who are unaware).
And that trick involves doing things that (even regular people) have watched and felt was a useful tool for success in their personal agenda [to appear/seem/put out as]: Humble/with humility (with a periodic tune-up in using those very words to their audiences so as to be seen as such as a reminder that they are: “humble”).
Even a humble person can be humbled, just like a person who isn’t humble [can be humbled]. But the fact of the matter is: a humble person is a humble person is a humble person-that’s just who a humble person ‘be’ (and is: Humble). Period.
Other than that, one merely appears to be humble (for a reason or reasons to obtain something, or things)…and when appearing to be humble, (like what I said in the third paragraph), there is a fine line that has to be balanced between:
- humility and vulnerability (which can make you look fake)
- vulnerability and pity (which can make you look pathetic and desperate)
…and that fine line is the balance between humble without selling yourself short but rather, with just enough confidence (over arrogance) but such that (too) you’re not SO humble that you teeter coming across as passive or insecure (while on the quest for seeming/appearing to be “humble”).
Tough job for somebody who’s not naturally and simply humble I know, right? (Ok…Sure, I will elaborate on what ‘natural’ humility feels like).
THE STARK-RAVING THING IS, ONLINE, YOU CANNOT T R U L Y GAUGE A PERSON’S TRUE HUMILITY (BY THEIR WORDS AND WHAT THEY SAY AND DON’T SAY).
Contrary to popular belief, a naturally humble person is not necessarily somebody who shields, or hides their greatness in the name of modesty or whatever. A naturally humble person instills a feeling in you that COMMANDS humility from you (even if only for the time you are in their presence). A naturally humble person is like the feel of that old lady with that soft voice and southern twang who you had that one conversation with-the one who maintained that peaceful tone and pace with a smile in her voice that somehow (without asking you to) forced you to slow and really LISTEN…she absorbed you…and in turn; you absorbed her.
A naturally humble person is a feeling like that cute, fat baby that was cooing or reaching out to you with wide eyes. Or the one with that wide-eyed wanderlust swiftly looking around at the world with excitement such that it made you want to clutch your chest (or talk baby talk).
It’s that innocent child that fearlessly and without trepidation, looked up at you asked a question that wasn’t deliberated (and somehow forced you to kneel or squat down and slow down to answer him/her).
…You get the idea of what I am saying. True humility reaches you like THAT.
TRULY HUMBLE PEOPLE (adults) HAVE A TENDENCY TO MAGNETICALLY PUT SOMETHING IN YOU THAT COMMANDS Y O U R HUMILITY IN RETURN (for the time being around them). THERE IS NO MANUAL OR LESSON SOMEBODY SHOULD BE ABLE TO GIVE YOU ABOUT HUMILITY OR BEING HUMBLE IF YOU (or they) ARE T R U L Y HUMBLE. HUMILITY AND BEING HUMBLE IS A SPIRIT. NOT LESSON, A SCOLDING, OR AN ASSERTION.
WHEN ONLINE, YOU SEE PEOPLE FIGHTING TO ASSERT THAT “HUMBLE” IS WHO AND WHAT THEY ARE BECAUSE (THEY VERY WELL MAY BE), BUT ONLINE (WHERE WORDS IS THE ONLY THING TO PUT FORTH “YOU”), IT’S NOT EASY TO PUT FORTH BEING “HUMBLE” (UNLESS YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT IT, ASSERTING IT AS BEING “WHO YOU ARE”). THAT’S WHY T R U E HUMILITY WILL FORCE YOU TO FIGHT TO ASSERT YOURSELF LIKE THAT–BECAUSE T R U E HUMILITY IS A PERSON TO PERSON SPIRIT-N O T A MECHANICAL (or digital) ONE.
While out in the world, I typically meet/come across at least one naturally humble human being each day that I am out in it [the virtual world]. I KNOW the difference in natural humility and mechanical ‘humility.’
Unfortunately, the things we seek or place importance on (in order to obtain things or elicit certain responses for) can reverse a naturally humble person just like it can condition a totally un-humble person to adapt to playing the game of humility (mechanical humility).
Well if you ARE going to play that game (to garner attention, likeability, a better position on the job, or even fame); the rules of humility are all just the same.
So although I elaborated on what it TRULY means to be humble, as well as that “humility game” (as it pertains the place where this messages reached you: Internet and via social media), to whom it concerns most probably are leading “regular” lives with “regular” jobs.
Although this platform obviously is crawling with your favorite celeb flipping pages, as 90 percent their job is about “image;” their job already schools them on lessons on appearing to be “humble” (so they probably don’t need the article I am about to turn over to you).
That being the case, while you [are most probably at your 9 to 5 reading this and/or you happen to not simply, or naturally BE that “humble” person who doesn’t need these gems], for you, here are some useful tools to use on the job (with regard to catching more flies with honey/ “being humble”) from career advice