Infamous SOLANGE “Shove on an Elevator” Tape Leaker Fired Happily-250k Ought To Console Him

Well…

The person who leaked the “Shove on an Elevator” video is retired…well…sort of.

Let get down to brass taxes shall we?

*whips out calculator*

Who needs $10.00 an hour which takes…uh…

*lowers head*

…at $10.00 an hour for 40 hours per week equals $400 per week (before taxes), which, at 52 weeks per year is about what…that rounds out to mere about $20,800 per year.

So let’s see…we’ll divide $20K into $250,000.00. Let’s see what we get…er…ruh…12.5

*lifts head*

So I’m guessing the man who leaked the tape could care less about being sent off to early retirement considering the fact that after shopping “Shove on an Elevator” to five different prospects, the highest bidder (our guys TerMiteZ) ended up saving him 12.5 years of time of sitting around in a tight, funny suit with shirt and arm pockets-adorned with pendants-watching random schmucks feeling sexually adventurous in an elevator at the Standard (hotel).

Stop your hating and sudden attacks of social media morality, let’s get “positive” and look at the bright side here.

He either shed light on a possible/alleged secretly verbally or physically abused woman whose sister was caught in the act stepping up for her,  or he showed the world what chronic PMS looks like- SOLANGE but definitely catapulted a superstar’s sister’s career to heights and interest at levels that lay dormant for years while in the interim, saved himself from 12.5 years of life in a funny suit with pockets and keys jiggling.

As well, he gave some parts of social media (all of a sudden) something to finally feel dignified and mature about-by complaining: “there’s more to life than Solange, Jay Z, and Beyonce,” download all the while giving bored Vine, YouTube, and Internet meme comedians much ado about something they enjoy wasting their time doing (and not getting paid for) in exchange for an @ reference for followers and and a laugh.

Life is good now for the guy and something was in it for all, perhaps.

 

File: Beyonce, Jay Z